trying to follow

Thursday, September 15

it's moods like this that stifle my productivity

i'm in the contemplative mood. introspection can be a good thing, a valuable learning tool. however, it can also be black hole in your clock.

it's cool being able to learn things about God in my relationships with others. doubt and faith. distrust and trust. sin and forgiveness. it actually takes the edge off pain at times. knowing that God loves me enough to look past my shortcomings, and not only forgive me but have faith in me to be like His Son (!). i doubt myself, but You. You don't. You saved this wretch and long to see him conformed to the likeness of Your Son. may i grow closer to that everyday. i stumble. pick me up... i just lost my train of thought. it was stolen by my stupid computer. the cursor forgot that it is supposed to blink...

while i'm still off the track, i must wonder aloud (aloud?) why you can't underline stuff in emails and blogs and whatnot. how are you supposed to convey the title of a movie?

God. transform me. and then use me to transform others. i'm sick of this i'm-trying-to-get-to-heaven-and-take-as-many-people-as-possible-with-me mentality. heaven would suck if someone wasn't a member of the kingdom while he was on earth. it starts now. it's about more than numbers. it's about how we view the world. it's about becoming less. it's about others being more important than me. it's about submission and love and, and, following Your Son. lead me.


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